somber

my lolo francis passed today.

i'm surprised how saddened i am with the news.
i feel heartbroken.
i made him tell the story of his life once. it was a school project-- to interview an older man or woman and write a paper about their life. i wish i could re-read what i wrote. or better yet, i wish i still had that recording. he was an accomplished man who did a lot and gave a lot. i'm very blessed to have known him.

this is a gentle reminder to myself. take nothing for granted dear christie. and love with all your heart.

deep brown wrinkles set
smiling face of wisdom passed
are no more today

underexposed

something that this photograph is, but the lakers (read: kobe) are not.
but i don't care...
this year is a must win.

the problem is...

i can't help talking smack.

i have the best job in the world in the best field in the world-- philanthropy. everyday i'm in a position to work with community organizations, have conversations about changing the world (or at least the health status of all californians) analyze groundbreaking programs and best of all, be in the business of giving money away.

now tell me, why can't i stop grunting?

i'll tell you why.
there is too much work and too little of me to do it.
this is recession. where the best job actually becomes nightmarish.